Creeper

I haven’t blogged for a while. Maybe it’s because all of my creative energy has been going into my other blog where I review comedy albums. Maybe I haven’t encountered any “good” stories lately. Or maybe I’ve just been lazy. Maybe it’s been a mix of all three (anything to throw you off the whole “‘lazy” option).

Whatever the reason, I share with you now the cute little story of a crazy woman in the car in front of me while I was driving to work this morning.

See, there was this crazy woman in the car in front of me on the way to work this morning.

She had started annoying me by randomly swerving and intermittently slowing down to 10 mph. No, before you even ask, I wasn’t tailgating her, so I don’t attribute the fact she kept slowing down to her trying to get back at me for driving too close. In fact, after seeing the mad driving skills she displayed, I was giving her plenty of room; I had no idea what was going to happen next. What I found particularly entertaining was the “NO CELL PHONE ZONE” bumper sticker on her car. In this case, it probably wouldn’t have hurt.

We approached a stoplight with three lanes: a left-turn lane, an I’m-going-straight lane, and a right-turn lane. As we approached the light, she turned on her left turn signal and stayed in the going-straight lane (as fate would have it, the one I needed to take, too). I just assumed she wasn’t familiar with the intersection and thought both left lanes were left-turn lanes. She stopped at the red light and then began to creep. Her front tires rolled past the white “Stop Here At A Red Light” line and she kept on rolling. I wondered if she thought it would make the light turn faster. It didn’t. So she continued to creep forward.

Soon it got to the point where cars in the cross-traffic had to swerve out of the way as she continued to creep and creep and creep. Being familiar with this route, I knew the light wasn’t going to change soon, so I grabbed my phone and snapped a quick photo, just because. Believe it or not, she began behind the white line.

This was taken before she crept even further into traffic. If you look closely at the picture, you can see that her left signal is on.

Incidentally, she ended up going straight instead of turning.

She continued to drive all crazy-like and I eventually got to pass her. She was older than dirt. She may even have been dead, I can’t be positive. Either way, it made for nice little blog-worthy commute.

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