Wait…Do I Know You?

Sarah and I have a lot in common but there’s one topic on which we just don’t see eye-to-eye and, so far, neither of us have budged.

I’m talking, of course, about Facebook friend requests.

Call me crazy, but I actually know all of my Facebook friends. And if someone sends me a request asking me to be their friend and I don’t know who they are, I happily press “ignore.” I’m not trying to up my friend count just for the sake of upping my friend count, and if someone isn’t going to take the time to drop me a line and kind of introduce themselves, well…they can find me on MySpace.

Sarah has a different outlook. As far as she is concerned, if someone asks to be her friend, she’s more than happy to accept. Everyone is welcome, and it’s all good. I blame it on her good heart. Me…not so much.

When she asks why I’m so quick to ignore a request from a total stranger, I give her what (to me) is an obvious answer: “They’re not my friend. I don’t know who they are.”

Why does someone who doesn’t know me want to be my Facebook friend? Do they really care how many stars I give the last movie I saw or what I did on my summer vacation? I just find it odd. If they want to know what’s on my mind, they can visit me here at my blog and find out what I am currently ranting about. And if they really do care (and if they do, I still find it odd. Call me paranoid), then why wouldn’t they drop me a line saying hello?

If some stranger came up to me on the street and said, “LET’S BE FRIENDS” I would be a little more than taken back. I’m like a jittery wild monkey. You can’t just run up to me and throw your arm around me or I’ll run screeching into the jungle brush. Bribe me with bananas: Say hi to me. Make small talk. Who do you know that I know? Tell me about your family. What have we got in common? (And I don’t really consider the fact that we both have Facebook accounts something in common.)

It’s not that I’m against meeting new people. I just wanna know who the freak they are first.



    Hi, I’m a total stranger & I just couldn’t resist commenting because I have actually been following your blog for a few weeks and am ready to enter into a non-stalking relationship with you. It’s not that I don’t think you’re worth stalking; I just have commitment issues & don’t want to waste your time or mine by not giving you my full attention.

    All kidding aside (are you still reading?), I used Google images several weeks ago to find a pic of cornflakes to go with an email to fellow management about an employee flaking out on a shift (I manage some fairly unreliable employees). Your image came up fourth – FOURTH! – and you had me at “Stupid People”.

    From there, I randomly read through more of your blogs and found myself literally laughing out loud at some of your posts and sent a link onto my husband – we were on honeymoon in Italy when the Made show you wrote about didn’t not came on, and we were glad to see that it got an equally poor and sarcastic review in the States. “Oddly-Timed Pat on the Back” was also forward-worthy.

    From your blog, I have also been sucked into the Stuff Christians Like blog and the three others blogs written by the same guy. (Guess I should have this conversation with him next, huh?) I’m sure lots of others on your Blogroll are equally funny and/or interesting, but I spend enough time at work surfing the net as it is. I have to prioritize, you know?

    Anyway, there’s your introduction. I’m mostly normal & don’t actually have any intention of stalking you or anything else; I just enjoy your raves, rants, & top 10s, and the way you write very humourously but honestly about life.

    I’ve entered my mySpace URL, but it’s set to private, because I also like to actually know people on my friends list.

    How’s that for irony? You’ll have to send me a friend request & let me know.


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