Follow That Dream!
Posted: January 23, 2012 Filed under: humor | Tags: follow that dream Leave a comment »From my hometown Indiana newspaper:
Um….’Nuff said.
Merry Christmas from Ed & Sarah 2011
Posted: December 24, 2011 Filed under: friends, humor | Tags: christmas, harmonica, ukulele 2 Comments »It’s another Christmas video from Ed & Sarah. You must have been really good this year! Or — depending on your point of view — really bad.
Meet & Greet, 11/30/2011
Posted: December 1, 2011 Filed under: humor Leave a comment »Today’s post-show Meet & Greet was especially productive. And by productive, I mean a lot of people said some really inappropriate things to me. In the show, I play a Jewish guy who is dating a Gentile. Her Southern conservative parents don’t know we’re dating…or that we live together…or that I’m Jewish, and hence hilarity ensues.
So, of course, after the show as we were shaking hands in the lobby an old woman came up to me and whispered, “A friend of mine has a daughter who’s dating….a Jew!” Please note that the phrase “a Jew” was dripping with disgust, as if she was saying someone fed her a glass of Metamucil with poop in it!
I also got a few “Not bad for a Jew” comments which are becoming surprisingly – and unsettlingly – common. I responded to one old man, “I’m not sure how to take that,” and he just laughed and laughed.
Of course, I also get my fair share of Jewish people who come through the line and make it a point to let me know that they know I’m not Jewish. One lady, who sounded exactly like Mike Myers’s Linda Richman character, said to me in all of her New Yawk accent, “You don’t sound Jewish to me.”
This isn’t the first time I’ve heard that comment and I always find it intriguing since none of my Jewish friends sound like the stereotype I can only assume she was talking about (and sounded like herself) and the only people who tell me I don’t sound Jewish are people who tawk like this, as they tawk about cawfee and dawgs and dawtahs.
Finally, a woman came through the line and asked if I was Italian. I told her I wasn’t, and she got a look on her face like I just punched her in the spleen. I don’t know if she was offended, disappointed, or just surprised that her profiling-by-looks had failed her.
Either way, it was a blogworthy day.
Meet & Greet, 11/29/2011
Posted: November 29, 2011 Filed under: humor 2 Comments »During today’s Meet & Greet after the show (in which I portray a Jewish guy), a man came up to me and asked, “Are you really Jewish?”
“No, I’m not,” I answered, to which he immediately responded,
“Ah, you’re a real American!”
Huh? What?
What the flip, old people?
Subtle
Posted: November 29, 2011 Filed under: friends, humor Leave a comment »The nice thing about Facebook is being able to connect with people with whom you went to elementary, junior, and high school.
The not-so nice thing about Facebook is when those people start sending you weird, creepy, poorly-written private messages. And then, when you don’t respond, the messages keep coming, each one getting more and more unsettling. You know, like these:
“Use it if you want?”
Whatever, creeper. I’m happily married. More than happily married.
So you can go wait by your phone for me to not call if you want. Or just fall in a hole. Whatevs.
*PS. The phrase “you were always my director for play time” refers (I think) to a class play I directed in Mrs. Bickley’s 5th grade English class. I especially enjoy how she managed to give that sweet memory a gross, icky connotation.
Now All I Need Is A VCR
Posted: November 26, 2011 Filed under: humor Leave a comment »As their Black Friday sale continues, Amazon tried to be sneaky and unload THIS bargain on us this morning.
What? Only 10% of them have been claimed? That’s crazy!
Of course, I don’t now if I’m more amazed by the fact that they still make and sell VHS tapes or that Marty McFly is here from 1985 and getting a bargain on some “Standard Grade” Maxells.
B
Posted: November 17, 2011 Filed under: friends, humor Leave a comment »I just saw this exchange on Facebook between two people who went to high school with me. Twenty-two years later and they’re still playing the exact same roles.
Meet & Greet, 11/17/2011
Posted: November 17, 2011 Filed under: humor Leave a comment »During today’s Meet & Greet, I got two awesome comments.
The first came from an old guy who exclaimed as he shook my hand, “Aw, you Jewboy!”
The second compliment came from an older gentleman who gave me a knowing wink, as if he were in on a big secret. “Not bad for an Italian!” he smiled.
Never in my life have I heard so many borderline (and not so borderline) racial slurs directed at me that had nothing to do with my actual ethnicity.
I think this is gonna be fun.
Meet & Greet, 11/16/2011
Posted: November 16, 2011 Filed under: humor Leave a comment »I am currently in a show out at a local theater and it’s a cute little comedy about a girl living in NYC whose Southern Baptist parents drop in for a surprise Christmas vacation. What her parents don’t know is that not only is she living with a guy (yours truly), but the guy she is with happens to be Jewish (gasp!). Of course, as the lies and the sneaking around pile up, more and more shenanigans ensue.
After the matinee performances, the cast assembles in the lobby to shake hands with the audience and thank them for coming. I’ve gotten some very, very nice comments from the people who came to see the show but what I would like to share here are the comments that I found straight-up confusing.
Like this one:
Today an old man ran up to me and said, “Aw, you Jew!”
I wasn’t sure what that meant, but as soon as he said it I knew I would be sharing it with you.
Veteran Luncheon
Posted: November 10, 2011 Filed under: friends, humor Leave a comment »From my hometown Indiana newspaper:
Hey…I’m not totally cynical. Sometimes, like when Dad makes the paper, I’m just proud.





